Have you forgiven yourself?

 Life is full of interactions with other individuals. And every interaction is driven by our own emotional wiring. We all have very customized and unique biases, perceptions, actions and reactions. No wonder we end up having a mix of pleasant as well unpleasant experiences and memories of these very events that further consolidate our future behavior. 

Have you experienced being very jumpy or reactive in some scenarios? Or being very repelled by some people even when others seem normal around ? And then there are moments of powerful hurting that seem to engraved in flesh that come alive in a surprisingly painful way. 

During coaching conversations women often say this to me..

"How can I forgive"? 

And the narrative about the person who hurt, the words, the actions, the pain and finally the emotional whirlpool engulfing the space, sweeps away all the peace in that very moment. 

The truth is you are hurting not because of what the other person did then, rather its because your core cannot believe you let it happen! There is a saying in sanskrit, ATMA RAKSHATO DHARMA, means protecting our soul is our primary duty. So yes if you failed to protect that you feel failed and that hurts.

So you do not have to forgive the other but .. yourself. And accept it happened. 

Acceptance is the key to your healing. 

And this should be followed by learning. What did you learn about yourself when this happened. There lies the answer on how to protect yourself further. I leave that for next time

To all women reading this, take a moment today, sit back, breathe and forgive yourself..